Rogue Dog

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Rogue Dog runs the Cateran Trail Ultra Marathon

Hi guys, Rogue here.

It’s been a busy weekend. It started last Friday when my human servant told me I was going on an adventure, she took me to the beach in her campervan. I was well happy ‘cos I love the beach, but I did not even get to see the sand before I was put in a big van that smelled of other dogs.

Rogue Dog in his van

Rogue Dog in his van

The human I was now with told me we were going for a run in some beautiful hills but we had to check it was ok for me to tag along as there are normally no dogs allowed. The nice lady at registration said it was fine for me to run (yippee) but she was laughing at my human for some reason. We spent the night sleeping in the smelly van, I think my new human was nervous ‘cos he kept waking up every 10 minutes and looking at his watch.

When I got out the van there were lots of folk around dressed in skimpy shorts and T-shirts, everyone was very excited. I think I must have looked particularly handsome this morning as everyone was staring at me. My human took me into the big crowd and started talking to other humans, in particular a man human and two girl humans. After the humans did lots of talking, we were off and running. For a little while we ran with the two girl humans from earlier, the man human was very rude and just sprinted off into the distance.

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Rogue Dog ready to begin

We came to a check point and my human asked a girl to take my picture, not sure why but lots of people wanted to take my picture (I am a very popular doggy today). Anyhoo, we were running for nearly 3hrs when the girl humans left me behind, I had to stay with my human to make sure he was alright (and he had the key to the van). My human had to go to the toilet in some woods and when we came back out there was nobody else in sight. We ran for a little while, then suddenly the human started swearing, I won’t repeat what he said but he seemed angry at himself. We turned back the way we had come and ran to a fence, the human then stood on a big fence post like a merecat for a few minutes, he swore some more then continued back down the track a bit further. At a junction he seemed quite relieved to see other humans, I take it my company is not good enough for him!

Not everyone understood why Rogue Dog was there

Not everyone understood why Rogue Dog was there

We ran on for ages, every time we passed someone or someone passed us they would ask about me, I have never been so popular since I went to a ceilidh. Every check point we ran through people cheered, some even woofed and I had my picture taken so many times I lost count. At one check point I was allowed a quick go on a zip-slide. My human got slower and slower, he was getting very sweaty too, I thought he may leave me behind and go on alone.

zip line Rogue dog

zip line Rogue dog

After one particular check point there was a big hill, my human took his phone out and read a text from his mate, she told him that other humans were going to give money to a doggy charity just ‘cos I was keeping him company on his little run, this cheered him up loads and he pushed on although still very slow. The scenery was spectacular although my human seemed to spend most of the time looking at the ground in front of his feet.

Rogue Dog got sweatier & sweatier

Rogue Dog got sweatier & sweatier

At one point, I could see two humans running toward us along the trail, I thought they must be lost ‘cos they’re going the wrong way. As we got closer, they got down on all fours and tried to impersonate me! They were laughing as they growled and snapped at the ankles of my human, my human was laughing too but I did not get the joke. Sometime humans are just weird.

At one check point a human in bright yellow waistcoat told me he would get me some dog treats and maybe a bone, STILL WAITING BY THE WAY! After what seemed like forever, we got to the last check point. My human seemed very relieved but I could tell he was also worried ‘cos other humans have spoken of ‘the monstrous hill’ in the last section. We set off close behind other humans but pretty soon they started to get further away, I think it’s probably the smell coming off my human that chased them up the hill.

Rogue Dog at the checkpoint

Rogue Dog at the checkpoint

We were on our own again and getting higher and higher, there was mist or low cloud blowing in and it was beautiful. Things got a little strange about now. My human started talking to me, when I did not answer him he started impersonating me and answering himself. Then he saw a massive rabbit, I got very excited but could not see the rabbit, then he seen another and another but I could not see them. He was laughing at himself and explained to me it was a hallucination, he is not right in the head and I’ll make an appointment for him to see a vet ASAP. We rounded a corner and I think he was hallucinating again ‘cos as he looked at the trail getting steeper and climbing into the heavens he said ” you’re having a f***ing giraffe”, I could not see the giraffe. It took him forever to get to the top, but once there, I could see the place we started from, it was still far away but all down-hill.

My human set off, very slow at first but getting slightly quicker with every step. Soon we were flying along; I could feel the wind making my ears flap. There was a group of humans standing outside cheering like mad, as I crossed the finish I got a big hug from a lady and some men shook my paw. The human man and girls from earlier were there and they were pleased to see me, they hugged me too, they must have been finished for ages as they all looked really fresh. We went into the pub and there was a massive cheer and deafening applause, I’ve never been so popular. My human looked stunned and I thought he was going to cry (big jessy). Lots of humans came and shook my paw, saying well done and you are nuts. Bit strange, it’s like they have never seen a dog run an ultra before.

The results are in & Rogue Dog was '1st dog'!

The results are in & Rogue Dog was ’1st dog’!

I was bit put out that I did not get to go to the prize giving or even just to have a beer ‘cos my human thought I smelled bad (he’s one to blooming talk). When we got home I was treated to a long soak in a bath that spun round and made me dizzy, then a bit of sunbathing to dry out. I heard the humans talking about how generous and supportive all the other humans have been. I can’t believe they would give so much money to help animals in need just because I went for a run with the human, I did not even find it that hard. I don’t know what my next adventure will be, maybe horse riding, wake boarding, rock climbing, motorbike riding, mountain biking, swimming with sharks or something else. Whatever it is I will love it, life is not a spectator sport get stuck in and be more dog.

Fellow CSE’ers who also ran the Cateran Trail Ultramarathon (though in better times than Rogue Dog ;-) ):

 

Until next time
Woof woof

Rogue Dog freshened up & ready for his next adventure

Rogue Dog freshened up & ready for his next adventure

Who is Rogue Dog?

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